Exit Zero

10. You’re always telling people not to believe their lying eyes. What they call ‘facts’ or ‘proof’ is just an attempt to elicit a confession, to get you to give up the fight. You will never confess, never surrender! They will pry the truth from your cold, dead hands.

9. You love mankind, it’s people you can’t stand: especially when they try to be funny. Or worse, ironic. You know that ‘jokes’ are a subversive way of tearing down everything you believe in. Comedians used to be funny before you found the one true, pure way, but now they’re all subversive, propogandistic hacks.

8. You save money by boycotting everything – You shop along political lines, boycotting supermarkets, newspapers, and fruits and vegetables that offend your ideological sensibilities. You haven’t seen any movies for years. You don’t like music or art either, since most artists are deluded, self involved hypocritical puppets who can’t keep their wrongheaded opinions to themselves. Even the weatherman has an agenda.

7. You’re surrounded by frenemies – Your thoroughly vetted friends appear to be following the one, true way, but what are they really up to? They could be splitters, or ‘concern trolls’, operatives for the enemies, trying to gather evidence to destroy your reputation and discredit your movement. You never let down your guard – you keep your friends close and your enemies closer – especially the enemy of your enemy, who is your friend. And this all makes perfect sense to you.

6. You know that two wrongs make a right – Your enemies and their evil minions have done bad things, and that gives you the right to be badder. Why limit yourself to two wrongs? Many wrongs = even more rights. That’s what your enemies do, and it works for them!

5. No publicity is bad publicity: If all of your comrades jumped off of a bridge, would you jump too? Yes, if the media were there and if it would force people to get their heads out of the sand and fight the real fight! You’re willing to create any sock/paper mache puppet, compare anyone to Hitler or Osama bin Laden, carry any weapon and/or sign, shout any nonsense at the top of your lungs, trash anyone’s reputation or appear nude at any time or place just to make them see the truth. Which is out there.

4. You told them so! – Every tragic, disastrous, odd or mundane event is the fault of your enemies and therefore proof that you’ve been right all along. You never miss a chance to say “I told you so”. So why are they still not listening? Where is the outrage??

3. Cui bono? You know there are no sneak attacks, no accidents, no goof ups and no enemies other than your own. You never stop asking ‘who benefits?’ because you know it’s always THEM.

2. The Underpants gnomes were right! You firmly believe in the underpants gnome theory of political action:

A. make extreme statements and attack anyone who disagrees with you
B. ???
C. victory!

Your plan should work – but you can never figure out what step B should be.

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Anyone who has ever been politically involved in currently hyper-partisan political action has probably held one or two of the attitudes listed above. If you find yourself agreeing with most of these attitudes, and if you’re not being paid large sums of money for your ‘activism’, it’s probably best for your and everyone’s sanity to find something better to do with your free time.

If you are a highly paid political pundit, please don’t take it personally if I cross the street, turn off the tv and radio, never hit your website and cross the street to avoid you.

And now, last but definitely not least, the long-awaited number one sign that you may be the lunatic fringe…

1. You’ve organized a large-scale campaign to threaten someone’s life or livelihood because they said something that you don’t agree with.

This does not fall into the category of normal political lunacy. This is the kind of fringe behavior that demands immediate treatment and/or jail time – even if you are being paid to do it.

* Post inspired by Cynthia Yockey, who organized the “Fire David Letterman” campaign that has now morphed into a “Boycott the Boycotters of Glen Beck” effort.

Ok, I’ve kind of abandoned this blog, and I probably shouldn’t just jump directly into a rant, but really, this Ralph Peters bit is just too egregious.

In Betraying our Dead Peters says:

Instead of acknowledging that radical Islam is the problem, we elected a president who blames America, whose idea of freedom is the right for women to suffer in silence behind a veil — and who counts among his mentors and friends those who damn our country or believe that our own government staged the tragedy of September 11, 2001.

No, Bush counts among his closest friends Saudi Prince Bandar, (Bandar Bush) whose wife contributed thousands of dollars to two of the 9/11 hijackers. According to later spin, she did this out of the goodness of her heart. She thought one of them had a cold or something.

And another one of Bush’s closest friends, James “fuck the Jews” Baker’s law firm helped the Saudis who sponsored the attacks from being sued by the victims’ families. The Saudis were able to weasel out of even the slightest wrist slapping through diplomatic immunity. That’s how the Republican government sought justice for the murder of thousands of Americans.

Ralph goes on…

Instead of confronting Saudi hate-mongers, our president bows down to the Saudi king.

Instead of recognizing the Saudi-sponsored Wahhabi cult as the core of the problem, our president blames Israel.

Excuse me Ralph, but when did President Bush ever recognize the Saudi sponsored Wahhabi cult as the core of the problem?

…and, instead of bowing to the Saudi king, Bush hugged and kissed him in Crawford, Texas. Meanwhile, back at the Wahhabi ranch, Saudi chief justice Sheik Saleh Al Luhaidan was appearing on Saudi TV, demanding that all young Saudi men go to Iraq to wage jihad against the Iraqis and the Americans. As a result of this (and as a result of King Abdullah’s quiet support of al Luhaidan) thousands of Americans and Iraqis were murdered by Saudi suicide bombers. (the majority of suicide bombers and foreign fighters in Iraq were Saudis)

How did Bush punish the Saudi king, or any Saudis, for their involvement in the war in Iraq? Was there any investigation? No.

Oh, and let’s not forget Bush’s coverup of certain pages from a congressional investigation into Saudi involvement in 9/11. The Bush-redacted section apparently laid out a money trail between Saudi Arabia and al Qaeda, including information about Omar al-Bayoumi, who gave financial assistance to 9-11 hijackers Nawaf al-Hazmi and Khalid al-Midhar.

The American government’s toadying attitude towards the Saudis who carried out and celebrated the 9/11 attacks is left and right issue. That’s why I’m a ‘moderate’ in the red vs. blue war. Both sides are worthless, both sides are more interested in promoting their own interests (and in tearing down the ‘opposition’) than they are in improving the lives of any Americans. But at least the left is honest about the fact that they’re willing to kiss anyone’s butt in the interests of ‘diplomacy.’

The right likes to pretend its nose isn’t brown. To those on the right who have been singing ‘the left is letting the terrorists win’ song for years, please stop insulting our intelligence. You’re not fooling anyone.